17 – Hair Today

Poem number 17
Hair Today
You’ve no hair. Do you care
That your head is shiny pink?
Do you wish that things were different
Whilst you sip your evening drink?
Do you dream of flowing tresses
Just like Samson,when you see
Your reflection in the mirror
In the bathroom whilst you wee?
Do you spread your head with lotion
In the morning when you rise
In the hope that by the evening
You’ll have hair down to your eyes?
Well console yourself good fellow
There’s an upside to your down
For though you’ve got no plumage
Just a dimpled mottled crown
You will never suffer dandruff
And you haven’t any lice
You’ll never need a dryer
Just a towelling will suffice,
You’ll shave off precious seconds
From your morning wash routine –
You’ll catch the bus whilst others
Are still struggling to get clean.
The wind won’t spoil your image
And the rain will bounce away
You’ll never have to worry
That your temple’s going grey
But best of all, dear baldie
Now your tree is just a stump
You can wear a stupid toupe
And pretend you’re Donald Trump!

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