361 – Alternative Carol Number 4

Poem number 361
Alternative Carol Number 4
Once a boy called David hit me
On my nose which cut and bled
He said my t-shirt did not fit me
Then he punched me in the head
I was always meek and mild
But Jesus Christ, that boy was wild.
On another sad occasion
David stole my favourite shoes
I walked home through streets of cobbles
And my feet got really bruised
I was small, and pretty passive
He was mad, and kind of massive.
Then when we were twenty seven
We both died of dysentery
Journeyed to the gates of Heaven
Peter gazed at him and me
Gave me wings and silver bell
Sent bad David down to Hell
So the moral of this story
Is that bad guys always lose
Especially those who punch small children
Then steal both their favourite shoes
I’ll stop now, before I bore you
Please be good, I now implore you.


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