418 – Giant Ducks From Outer Space

Poem number 418


Giant Ducks From Outer Space


Giant ducks from Outer Space

Come down here to peck your face

12 feet high with armoured beaks

They’ll gouge your eyes and chew your cheeks

Their Krypton wings glow green with ire

They set a bakery on fire

‘Revenge!” they quack, “We’ll peck you dead!

For feeding Earth Ducks nought but bread!

What’s wrong with chops? What’s wrong with steak?

Why always bits of mouldy cake?

The endless crusts, the rain of crumbs –

Just stick your loaves right up your bums!

You should’ve fed them Sunday roast

Not bread, but now you’re EARTHLING TOAST!”

Quack quack quack, revenge is sweet

The giant ducks swarm down the street

Peck peck peck, take that and that

They peck the thin, they peck the fat

Giant ducks come down from Space

To terrorise the Human race

Peck peck peck peck quack quack quack

Take cover! Leg it! Duck attack!


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